Earlier today I ran by the post office to ship a package. It’s full on spring & I decided it was time to pull out spring dresses. A women in line complemented me on my look & when I told her it was from #eShakti she was totally confused, & we had a good laugh as I explained yes they are as good as they claim on Facebook. Pockets, custom sizing and all, they are that good. Feeling pretty, and wanting to take advantage of the one day the magnolia tree will have fabulous blooms, I tried to get some pictures.

And this is when I learned the self conscious teen inside me is still alive and well.

In my head, I still have the body I had in high school, which isn’t too different from the brown-haired model on the ad. I just had much bigger hair. Seeing the pictures I took, I had a moment of “oh shit, I must diet… ” But that was wrong. I’m 45, not 15. I embrace the diversity of bodies I see on projects like @girlgaze. I am a diverse body. This body – my body – has been lived in, seen things, done things, and experienced the world (and all the foods of the world). It has done more than 15 year old me ever dreamed.

That woman at the post office, thin and the societal ideal in her athleisurewear, didn’t see a fat middle-aged loser. She saw someone in a perfectly fitting beautiful dress, someone full of confidence and pleased with spring. I need to learn how to see what she was able to see. And, maybe this larger lady in the picture, who stress ate through winter and a job change, needs to get a couple more perfectly fitting dresses from www.eshakti.com because, really, they are as cute as they look on Facebook and they do have pockets. (And if you decide to shop there, my referral code is PAMELAGAY.)

Embrace who you are and smell some flowers (or at least give them a hard look if pollen isn’t your thing).